Alex Rants About Nerds, Twins, and the Loss of Definitions

AUGUST 5, 2014

We live in a society where words have lost their meanings. From the misuse of the word “literally" to the overuse of the word "surreal”, society has thrown away their dictionaries and succumbed to the tyranny of Relativism. Soon, no one will understand each other because we will have eroded all meaning from every word in the English language.

Now, let me give you two examples of what I mean. These two words have in recent days begun to annoy me because they are being used far too often.

"Nerdy"

Nowadays, all you need to be called “nerdy” is a pair of glasses….. NO! NO! NO!

I call this “The Big Bang Theory Effect.”

Granted, when The Big Bang Theory started, it was truly about nerds. A bunch of comic-book-obsessed, socially-awkward men who could not get a date to save their lives. Now, every one of them has a girlfriend, a fiancée, or a wife.

This show is symptomatic of the culture as a whole. To mainstream society, “nerdy” has become a fashion style. But, that is not what the word originally meant.

It was originally a derogatory term used to make fun of those who were weird, did not fit in, and generally had either no friends or were only friends with one or two other nerds. When a term that originally described a small minority of people is used flippantly with society as a whole, it no longer has any meaning.

None of the following people are nerdy:

I found all of those pictures by doing a Google image search for “Nerdy.” Yet, strangely, none of them are nerdy.

These are circumstances under which it is acceptable to apply the label “Nerdy”:

• You can name multiple comic book authors
• Your name is sewn into your underpants
• You have dressed up in a superhero costume when home alone for no reason
• You have a book shelf dedicated to your favorite superhero

• People think you are obsessed with a comic book character
• You get made fun of or have been made fun of for liking comic books, superheroes, computers, etc.
• You get angry when discussing who would win in a hypothetical fight between superheroes/villains

These are things that can negate the above mentioned qualifications for “Nerdom”:

• Members of the opposite gender have been known to salivate over your looks
• Members of your gender salivate over the looks of your significant gender
• You have seen the movie The Dark Knight Rises, but are unable to identify this comic book villain:

• Your favorite live-action Batman is George Clooney
• You have never read a comic book
• You recognize Robin as Batman’s sidekick, but the names “Jason Todd”, “Tim Drake”, “Stephanie Brown”, and “Damian Wayne” mean nothing to you

Twins

"Oh! You’re both wearing purple; you could be twins."

…..and you could be punched in larynx.

I have noticed a disturbing and repulsive trend. If two individuals wear clothing that is in any way similar, they are labeled as “twins.”

STOP IT!

In the second tweet, they are not wearing matching outfits. Nor are their outfits even “similar.”

Here are the following conditions under which it is acceptable to call your self a “twin”:

• You were in the same womb at the same time as some else.
• You get paid to play baseball for Minnesota or one of their minor league affiliates.

THAT IS IT.

Knock it off!